Nicole Fitzpatrick
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I will not let my anxiety get the best of me. I have learned some tough lessons, really, in the most horrible way imaginable. But it humbles me not to take any day I kiss Liv for granted.
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Been rocking the night shift for nearly 5 months now…And that ends at 6-6:30 a.m. right?!?! Because then, I am completely useless. Thanks for taking over that last window, Dad.
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And I feel I can’t. I can’t anymore. Because I am a mother. I can’t. Fall apart.
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… that I am getting better at decoding Liv’s needs, likes and dislikes, reactions, etc. I do know you anak. Because you are mine.
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I never thought repetition would be the greatest adventure. Sure, Liv is growing up so fast, and every milestone is embraced with the loveliest affection and sense of pride. But walking the same path practically every day, doing the same activities during wake windows, ending the day at 8 pm at the latest. And doing
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Truth is, no book, forum, or fellow parent knows Liv better than I do. I got this.
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Of course Berlin would have a rave for families. I do not know why I ever doubted that. It was amazing to dance with my 4-month-old baby – even only for an hour. noumama. still noupa. still techno. Same, same, but not the saaaaaame.
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I think it is pretty fucking amazing that this techno goddess came forward about her miscarriages. Why? Because it takes courage. Because keeping a pregnancy secret “until it is safe” or suffering in silence when it unfortunately does happen is not the answer. And I am so sorry it happened to her. To so many
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Yes, you are so proud of your body for carrying a healthy, gorgeous, miraculous baby for more than 9 months and experiencing that most insane, incredible, huge thing that is birth. Yes, mama, you did it. You are a queen. The first seconds, days, weeks are crazy. But once your new normal takes shape, and
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A year ago today, I tested positive with Liv.W Those 2 lines. You never forget that rush, do you? A pregnancy test does not mean a baby. But a pregnancy test does mean life. And I hold on to dear Liv with gratitude, purpose and commitment.
noumama 